Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
