so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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