I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
