no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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