Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
