just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
