Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
