Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
