I'm jealous of your bromance
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
