I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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