Porn is love you can see.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
