we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
