trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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