At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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