she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
