And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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