what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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