Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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