I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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