So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
