i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
