We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
