This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Randomize
