Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
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