I like my sex mixed with concussions.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize