is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
