I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
