What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
