You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
this boner is exhausting
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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