oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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