Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
