why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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