I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
