god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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