This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
