I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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