we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
