NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
