oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize