I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You were trust falling into bushes
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
