There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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