I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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