1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
