I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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