Is it because I queefed?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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