I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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