Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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