I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
