i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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