If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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